Spontaneous ∂erivation

I first learned about this new anthology of speculative SF/F stories over at John Scalzi’s Whatever.

Thoughtcrime Experiments is available for free online under a Creative Commons Attribute-Noncommercial-Sharealike 3.0 license, in HTML and PDF formats at their site.

They did encourage folks to remix, so I decided to create various formats, as I usually do.

Thoughtcrime Experiments, now available for the Kindle and friends:

  Thoughtcrime Experiments [Kindle/Mobipocket] (623.1 KiB, 1,067 hits)
  Thoughtcrime Experiments [ePub] (1.1 MiB, 761 hits)
  Thoughtcrime Experiments [Sony Reader] (709.7 KiB, 546 hits)
  Thoughtcrime Experiments [Microsoft Reader] (1.1 MiB, 651 hits)

iPhone users: you can use this page as a Stanza library.

Note: for those who own a Kindle 2, this file has section-by-section navigation, i.e., toggling the little joystick left and right will allow you to skip forwards or backwards by stories.

Silent Night
by João Barreiros
infinityplus: Original • Kindle-friendly¹

I tend to like surreal fiction, and this story is what may be termed “gonzo futurism.” Think a strong dose of Hunter S. Thompson mixed with near-future science fiction; or for short cut, think Warren Ellis.

In the twenty fifth year of this endless war, on the banks of Lake Saimaa, I finally killed my first Santa Claus. It was pure luck… honestly.

I put together a very short ruby program to pick random sentences from a block of text, sort of a way to preview sans context² a book in quick bites to get a sense of the language and, with enough samples relative to the size of the text, theme and style.

Here’s what we’ve got to work with:

Automatics usually jam, where magic rules.

On the table there lie the comic my father tore up in an educational rage when I was seven, which I never saw again, and the passenger aeroplane kit, with take-off flashing lightslights, that someone gave to a school chum.

One survivor…

They blot out the pilot’s field of vision, who by force of circumstances has neither radar nor an automatic pilot to assist him.

My instructors told me that getting what you always want is like dying a little, like losing the ability to wish for the impossible.

As if pacifism could prevent violence.

A fire of crackling pine cones burns in the open hearth.

Not the holiday usual by a long shot.

S∂’s full 2008 Advent Calendar.

1. The Kindle-friendly version is NOT hosted on my site; this is a CGI script that filters the more annoying framing HTML from the story text. You can still save the filtered HTML and convert it for your Kindle (with some help from Amazon). And remember, don’t distribute this thing. [↩]
2. Spoilers. [↩]

Carol for Mixed Voices
by Madeleine Rose Reardon Dimond
Strange Horizons: Original Part 1 • Part 2
Kindle-friendly¹

A near-future science fiction tale where the President of the United States still takes after President Bush (this story happens to have been written back in 2001).

Imagine President Bush speaking to aliens. No, imagine him having already spoken to the aliens, in an atonal language, where he’s just insulted and threatened them, we assume by accident.

First Contact team specialist Marley must use all her wits to save the country’s face, not to mention the world.

Madeleine Rose Reardon Dimond also wrote another, quite different holiday SF story for Strange Horizons, “War of the Lights”, which starts out with:

The Christmas season was already off to a bad start when a spaceship landed on top of my house. I hate it when that happens.

I was dragging my tail home in the single-digit morning hours, having just played a double set in a joint where I wouldn’t be caught dead. As usual, I was ruminating over why the audience thought I should be playing Tejano or mariachi — and wondering if either or both would help my career. I was also trying to ignore the Santa sleigh drawn by pink flamingos and the nativity with Blessed Virgin Britney Spears and ‘N Sync Wise Men.

Nested on my roof was a metallic ovoid that spanned the width of my house. It pulsed a rotating rainbow of colors.

Continue: Original • Kindle-friendly

This story is based on a song by the Therapy Sisters:

S∂’s full 2008 Advent Calendar.

1. The Kindle-friendly version is NOT hosted on my site; this is a CGI script that filters the more annoying framing HTML from the story text. You can still save the filtered HTML and convert it for your Kindle (with some help from Amazon). And remember, don’t distribute this thing. [↩]

Fear Itself
A Christmas Story
by Lewis Shiner
Fiction Liberation Front: Original • Kindle-friendly¹

Lewis Shiner comments: “My first Christmas story. Not exactly a Hallmark card.”

This is the first CC-licensed work on this year’s Advent Calendar, under the Attribution-No Commercial-No Derivative Works license.

You’ll find more of Lewis Shiner’s work on his Fiction Liberation Front website. My favorite is “Snowbirds” (Original and Kindle-friendly).

S∂’s full 2008 Advent Calendar.

1. The Kindle-friendly version is NOT hosted on my site; this is a CGI script that filters the more annoying framing HTML from the story text. You can still save the filtered HTML and convert it for your Kindle (with some help from Amazon). [↩]

How the Little Rabbi Grew
by Eliot Fintushel
Strange Horizons: Original • Kindle-friendly¹

This one’s different from the rest: a Hanukkah story, which is even rarer in the Fantasy/Science Fiction field.

And the child would tell her stories. When he was six, Rabbi Shlomo told her how the Almighty had described to him the exact circumstances of the creation. She listened cross-legged on an old blue quilt she had spread across the couchgrass, and he sat on his knees at the edge of the quilt, half on and half off. If it was cold they would wrap themselves together in the blue quilt, all comfy, like two buns in a broiler, a big one and a little.

If you like Eliot Fintushel’s work, check out a video of him playing the theremin. His first novel, Breakfast with the Ones You Love, is available on the Kindle.

S∂’s full 2008 Advent Calendar.

1. The Kindle-friendly version is NOT hosted on my site; this is a CGI script that filters the more annoying framing HTML from the story text. You can still save the filtered HTML and convert it for your Kindle (with some help from Amazon). And remember: don’t distribute this thing. [↩]

Thrilling Holiday Tales
by Jeff Patterson
Bad Day Studio: Original • Kindle-friendly¹

Every year, Jeff Patterson puts up a Science Fiction holiday card, each one a short story. This, from 2001, is one of my favorites: an action pulp adventure, packed into one 2.5k-word punch.

The 2008 card isn’t up yet, but when it is, it’ll be part of this advent calendar. For Holiday FSF is far too rare.

You can also buy his Solstice Chronicles from LuLu, either as a paperback or as a PDF download.

S∂’s full 2008 Advent Calendar.

1. The Kindle-friendly version is NOT hosted on my site; this is a CGI script that filters the more annoying framing HTML from the story text. You can still save the filtered HTML and convert it for your Kindle (with some help from Amazon). And remember: don’t distribute this thing. [↩]

The Christmas Count
by David B. Coe
SCIFiction: Original • Kindle-friendly¹

Of the various things I learned since eBookifying the SCIFiction archives for myself is that bird-watching enthusiasts have a holiday tradition called The Christmas Bird Count. Basically, you wander out and count the number and kinds of birds you saw.

The results are sent to the Audubon Society, which generates statistics to identify environmental patterns and issues. It’s a win-win situation: a fun outing for bird watchers, and information for the Audubon Society.

But what if you see something a bit… out of the ordinary?

David B. Coe’s website has free samples from his books, and he also blogs, on a relatively frequent basis (every few days).

S∂’s full 2008 Advent Calendar.

1. The Kindle-friendly version is NOT hosted on my site; this is a CGI script that filters the more annoying framing HTML from the story text. You can still save the filtered HTML and convert it for your Kindle (with some help from Amazon). And remember: don’t distribute this thing. [↩]

The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus
by L. Frank Baum • Feedbooks

The biography of Santa Claus as written by L. Frank Baum, the creator of The Wizard of Oz series, also available on Feedbooks.

For those who want a little more bite in their story, there’s also this short story:

A Kidnapped Santa Claus
by L. Frank Baum • Feedbooks

Santa Claus is kidnapped by demons.

Sometimes I think Baum is a bit wonderfully twisted.

S∂’s full 2008 Advent Calendar.

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